Chapter 11, part 20.

Hi, its been awhile. I'm afraid, i'm afraid of the future, i'm afraid of loneliness, i'm afraid of being me. I'm afraid of what other's might think of me honestly, even though i always act as though i dont care, but i really do deep down. I'm afraid of failing, i'm afraid of changes. i'm afraid when someone leaves me. 

It really sucks how people just walk away without saying goodbye, it really sucks. I'm not perpared at all. It sucks how someone who talks for you constantly for  a few months suddenly just leaves. Like dont you feel anything for our friendship? Do i not mean a thing? Whats the point of knowing each other when you're not even staying? Whats the point of you sharing your life stories with me, asking me to trust you? Whats the point? Tell me? I really dont get it, no, i dont need you to be constantly talking to me. I dont know whats on your mind, but then again, it doesnt matter anymore, bc you're gone. Well, half of my friends is gone. And maybe end of the day, i'm really a shitty friend.