Chapter 12, part 10.

I hate the person i am now. I seem to make everybody upset, that sucks. It really sucks, i hate how fk up my attitude is. I hate everything about myself right now. Sometimes, i just think, im better off dead maybe everyone would be happier.. Idk why suddenly i'm so affected, i just to not care about alot of things, im used to shutting all my emotions up. And just be the happy person. Idk what change me. Time? As part of growing up? I dont know. Things wasnt supposed to turn out this way... Whats wrong with me.. I never felt so defeated in my life. I never felt so upset in sucha long time. Was i a fking mistake? Im tired, i really am. Every night, i try my best to stay up so that i wont sleep, always pray that once i sleep, i will never wake up. I know im selfish thinking this way, but... Its truth. I'm really better off dead.. I hate depression, but i cant get rid of it. I'm sorry. I really tried this time, i really did...